Adoribull Tag Gothic

acheesecakewrites:

• You open the tag. There are twenty-seven new fics. You are pleased. The fics have titles like “strength” and “endless devotion.” They feel prophetic, or maybe ironic. They might be mocking your optimism.

• #Dorian is a good friend. You open it, begin to read. And read. And read. You reach the end. “Who is Dorian?” You wonder. That name was never mentioned. “What is an Iron Bull?”

• Cullen and a female Trevelyan are kissing on the battlements. You wait patiently for Dorian and Bull to come in. They are in the tavern, drinking. “I’m drunk,” says Dorian. “I’m horny,” says the Iron Bull. “Oh boys,” says the Inquisitor. “Never change.” The Inquisitor’s word is law. 

• #Dorian is a good friend. To be a good friend, all you need to do is give advice. Love and fashion. Clothes and boys. He knows all. Do not question him. Ignore his advice at your own peril. He is a good friend, but he can be very… sassy.

• #Lavellan/Solas, #Female Lavellan/Solas, #Female Mage Lavellan/Solas, #Inquisitor/Solas, #Female Inquisitor/Solas, #Female Lavellan/Fen’Harel, #Female Mage Inquisitor/Solas, #Iron Bull/Dorian Pavus (implied). Words: 5,873,292. Chapters: 86/?

• #Modern Girl In Thedas!!!! #Not A Self Insert!!! You worry about the ones that are self-inserts. How do they get out? 380,826 words later, you still don’t know.

• Dorian speaks in one fic. “I prefer men,” he intones breathlessly. “But you are special, Inquisitor.” His skin is exotically dark, his eyes are the color of clear crystal gemstones and sparkle like limpid pools. “You are not like other girls.” 

• “This fic is my version of Inquisition. Slight AU. Canon Divergence.” You open it to find yourself playing the game again, even though you’re on a train and  reading on your phone. Dorian appears, mustache quivering with emotion. “Help me deal with this.” He never returns. Why were you here to begin with? Have you become the modern girl in Thedas?

• The Iron Bull is scary, or the Iron Bull does not exist. He deserves better, you think to yourself. No! The fics tell you. Solas deserved better!

• Eight fics have updated while you looked at the tag. None of then are about Dorian or about Bull.

• #Lavellan/Cullen Rutherford, #Mage Lavellan/Cullen Rutherford, #Female Mage Lavellan/Cullen Rutherford, #Female Lavellan/Cullen Rutherford, #Iron Bull/Dorian Pavus (minor). Words: 177,994. Chapters: 64/?